Spring happened. I hate it. Of course, I’m sure you’re all shocked that the ever-so-bright and cheery ray of sunshine that I am would hate something as innocuous and lovable as spring. But I have a few good reasons, more than just “I like sitting in the dark and listening to Evanescence on repeat because THEY TOTALLY GET ME MAN”.
First off, it completely ruins the fashion game. Completely. All the best fashion options come in layers: the suit, awesome pea coats, scarves, the sweater-on-button-up combo. Once spring hits you get one shirt and some flimsy-ass pants, and guess what? You’re gonna go out and do a couple of errands, or come home from work, and it’s sweat-town all up in that shirt. Might as well burn it and get a new one, because at that point it’s like you’re wearing a plaid swamp on your shoulders.
Also, bugs. The good thing about winter is that it causes those miserable little things to go back into their murder-holes and stop trying to sting me in the damn eye while I try and go on a run. But with the pollen sneezing itself all over the place like manna from the freaking sky, those little bugs come flying out intent on ruining everyone’s good time. Shame on you, bugs. Don’t you like picnics? Or family barbecues? OR FRIENDSHIP
That being said…there is a certain feel about spring I like. Usually when something comes along that makes most of the people I like happy, I get pretty happy too. Even if it’s something I hate. Pretty simple concept really. So I’ll put up with it…for now. But I’ll still be waiting, in secret, for some grey clouds so I can put on a few scarves and laugh in all those happy tween couples’ faces.
Here’s a song to make your springtime slightly less crappy. It’s Malibu by LaVish: